Final: The Last Shot

Context/ reflection:

            The piece that I am sharing is a slice of life called “The Final Shot”. In this piece, I show how I’ve grown as a writer. I chose this piece because I thought it needed work and I could fix it. To edit this piece, I added more details and made things more clear.  These changes made my piece better because they connected to your sense instead or just telling you what it was like.

My piece:

I stood watching as my teammates shot. The ice covered in snow from our blades. I skate to center as everyone in the rink is silent. As I stop, I can hear and feel the ice crackle underneath my blades. I stop and take in the warm air around my head. I stand in a ready position. There’s a yell from my bench and then silence. I look straight at the goalie, thinking about the back of the net. The linesman skates away from center and stands. I quickly look his way, then back at the girl. The linesman raises his hand, and in a second blows the whistle. I could hear my heart beating and the wind flying through my helmet. I focus more and hear my metal blades on the ice. I look into the goalie’s eyes and make my move. I pull my stick left, then quickly as the goalie dives, I pull it back and shoot the puck. I skate around the net and look at the puck sitting there. As I skate away I looked back at the goalie with her team and chuckle under my breath. I look at my bench with all my team mates cheering and jumping as they skated towards me. Everyone congratulates me, the teams shake hands, and my team celebrates on the ice with our victory in mind.

About the author:

            Hi, my name is Nicole Nixon. I never realized how bad my grammar and structuring was until the end of seventh grade. I’m not saying I could go out and write a book, but I’ve definitely improved from sixth grade and the beginning of seventh. I think that projects and research project helped with learning all of this because when you write something down, it helps you remember this, and then we would present them. I thought this year was a lot of fun. Thanks Ms. Cernera!